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I always wanted to write the introductory column for a big, sexy gaming magazine like Inquest or Duelist or Dragon or White Dwarf. Not the shitty, corporate-bloviated sellout versions of those rags which are their most recent and nepotistic entries, but the rags in their heydays, when you would be legitimately excited when the fat new issue showed up like a mystical scroll sporting Frank Frazetta art at your local comic book shop.

This is probably as close as the sad economic reality which slowly killed those magazines will ever let me get. Fuck it; at least I can curse here. Even pursuing a lesser version of your dreams is still pursuing them.

Welcome to the Five Emperors website. Going forward this is going to be the central hub for all things Five Emperors and Mushroom Press. All the news, links to the patreon, kickstarter announcements, fan forums, even a store are going to be either hosted or linked through here.

And the monthly byline is going to be here too, naturally.

Maybe it’s not a thick, sexy tome of kickass art, gaming articles by actual gamers, design musings and exclusive interviews with game designers of yore, but it’s not a bad free online equivalent.

So welcome, to this lesser but still vibrant dreamspace. Here, you are free to unclench and soak in some authentically old-school pulp fantasy outside of the twitchy dopamine engines of the indecorous modern pablum.

What’s the plan, beyond that? Well, I’m not the best at planning. But I am stubborn as hell and deeply committed to making this place the Fistiest Place on Earth. So let’s conclude our introduction with the same solemn vow I swear to anyone goodly enough to give these endeavors their time and attention:

“To you, humble reader, I vow to use my time, creativity and resources to make this place the most Awesome thing it can possibly be” ~ Joel T. Clark